More than 70% of people struggle with impostor syndrome, that crushing fear of being found out to be a fraud. It affects millions of Americans including me–and more likely than not, it also affects you.
In my previous post, I wrote about the negative effects of impostor syndrome and how an ongoing skepticism of our own abilities could be detrimental to our physical, professional, and financial wellbeing.
I concluded that impostor syndrome is not easily overcome as even the most successful people struggle with impostorism despite substantial accomplishments.
Even so, are there ways to deal with impostor syndrome? Is it possible to minimize the adverse effects it causes?
Here are some tactics I use to fight impostor syndrome:
1. Be yourself
By definition, to be an impostor is to pretend to be someone you’re not. But even when we’re not consciously pretending, trying to be like someone else puts us at risk for chronic discontentment.
We also set ourselves up for disappointment when we invariably fail to assume that prized identity. We end up invalidating our unique abilities while endorsing someone else’s.
I have been guilty of striving to the point of misery. I’ve come to realize that I’m better off working towards becoming the best version of myself instead of blindly chasing after someone else’s glorious status.
You shine the brightest when you’re authentically yourself and content in your own skin. You won’t have to worry about being revealed as a fraud because you’re actively being, not impersonating.
2. Embrace your journey
A few years ago, my husband and I hiked the Calico Tanks Trail in Red Rock Canyon near Las Vegas. Along the two-mile hike through windburnt rubble, we passed numerous stacks of stone slabs formed by visitors passing through. The thousands of visitors represented in those stacks painted a vivid picture of the trails in life that are traversed by many, yet each person’s path is slightly different from another’s.
You’re on a journey that is uniquely your own. You can learn to embrace it and own the trail that you’re on, including all of its triumphs and missteps. Or, as we often do, we can pine for another trail and miss out on the beauty and refining moments of this one.
In the end, it’s the journey that defines your character, not the destination. Relish the process. Your story will provide all the validation you need.In the end, it’s the journey that defines your character, not the destination. Relish the process. Your story will provide all the validation you need. Click To Tweet
3. Remember how far you’ve come
When I run a 5K, I look for the mile markers. I’m not a runner so I get tired and it’s hard for me to keep up.
Each passing mile not only brings me closer to the finish line, it serves as proof that I’m capable. The repeated sense of achievement–however small–becomes a motivator for me to persevere and keep going.
We can get fixated on the destination or ETA (estimated time of arrival). But not everything hinges on ETA. Remember where you started and the progress you’ve made to get to this point. That could be a powerful antidote to self-doubt and impostor syndrome.
4. Examine your motives
If you’re trying to achieve something and it’s not going the way you want, take a pause and remind yourself why you’re attempting it in the first place.
Are you motivated by external rewards? Psychologists call this extrinsic motivation. Rewards often used to motivate include money, trophies, praise, public acclaim, etc.
Intrinsic motivation, on the other hand, doesn’t require external rewards. You’re intrinsically motivated if you’re doing something for personal fun or enjoyment in the task itself.
As research shows, engaging external incentives could backfire because it could potentially undermine your confidence in your own abilities and diminish the perceived value of what you’re doing. In effect, extrinsic motivation fuels impostor syndrome.
Weed out extrinsic motivations by revisiting your ‘Why’ and being more intentional with your intentions.
5. Don’t go it alone
I often get asked how I do everything that I do. The answer is: I don’t.
I’m blessed to have a network of friends, family, and mentors to support me and guide me. I wouldn’t get very far without the affirmation and validation given by these people. And in my darkest moments of doubt, my faithful allies remind me of my real identity and the significance of what I’m doing.
There is no such thing as a self-made man or woman. None of us make it on our own. And nobody can endure failure alone. Click To TweetThere is no such thing as a self-made man or woman. None of us make it on our own. And nobody can endure failure alone.
Find your tribe. Lean on others. Practice interdependence.
6. Be patient
In his book Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell poses that it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert in something. That’s 5 years of full time dedication.
Whether it’s true or not (scientists have since tried to debunk the theory), the fact remains that it takes a lot of work to master anything.
If your impostor syndrome is stemming from a lack of instant results, you may need to rethink your expectations.
We only hear about the successes of famous people after they’ve become, well, famous. We don’t know about the grueling hours and painstaking effort it took for them to get there. This is known as the ‘Iceberg Illusion’.
Keep doing what you’re doing and learning what you’re learning. You’ll get somewhere someday. And even if you don’t, you’ll likely have learned some important lessons that only patience can teach.
7. Don’t “fake it ‘til you make it”
‘Fake it ‘til you make it’ is a popular prescription for dealing with impostor syndrome but I don’t think it’s the best advice. There’s no need for deception when you’re sincere about becoming your best. The surest way to be revealed as a phony is to actually be a phony.
Instead, admit to your shortcomings. Don’t claim to be the expert if you’re not. Be a student and learn as you go. Exercise integrity.
Rather than faking your abilities, believe in them. That’ll speak for itself. Click To TweetRather than faking your abilities, believe in them. That’ll speak for itself.
8. Teach someone else
Albert Einstein is credited with the quote, “If you can’t explain [something] simply, you don’t understand it well enough.”
Teaching concepts to others can give you a good gauge of how well you understand them. It provides mental proof that you do know what you’re talking about. You might just be surprised!
If there happens to be an area you don’t seem to have as good of a grasp on, you can focus your efforts on growing or studying that area further.
I haven’t taught formally but when I can explain ideas well to others, it’s one of the best ways to boost my confidence and minimize feelings of impostor syndrome.
9. Focus on giving instead of performing
Like teaching, giving is an effective way to shift the focus from ourselves to others. By giving our time, energy, and talents for others, we can stop navel-gazing and focus on helping someone else instead.
There are many ways you can give to others. Find volunteer opportunities and join community initiatives. Allow yourself to be defined by compassion and sincerity instead of fear and insecurity.
I have found that giving is a powerful way to overcome the constant pressure to perform for my inner critic. Instead of always being on trial, I can be of service to others.
The truth about feeling fake
Some day, perhaps we’ll look back and see that the great tragedy of our era was not our vanity in overachievement but rather the overwhelming void of satisfaction derived from those achievements.Some day, perhaps we'll look back and see that the great tragedy of our era was not our vanity in overachievement but rather the overwhelming void of satisfaction derived from those achievements. Click To Tweet
An article from the Hamilton Spectator concludes, “Somewhere along the way we let others define success and failure for us. We disconnected, put on a mask, and lost our way.”
Though most of us will struggle with impostor syndrome at some point in our lives, we don’t have to be defined by it.
Using tactics like the ones above can not only minimize the negative effects of impostor syndrome, it can produce positive benefits as well. Dealing with these challenges can refine you to become truer to yourself and better at your craft. It can help you develop resilience and a deep sense of compassion for yourself and others. It can also teach you integrity and perseverance among other emotional intelligence skills.
If you struggle with impostor syndrome, there’s a silver lining. You can harness the transformative power of growing into the best version of you–the unique person you were always meant to be.
